Monday, August 11, 2008

The Aura Around Aurum

On the occasion of independent India bagging it's first individual Olympic Gold, here's a countdown...

An Olympic gold medal in hand is worth (much more than):

10. Two boxes of champagne bottles

9. Two truck loads of gifts

8. Two duplex flats at Colaba

7. Two phone calls from the country's premier
(or Sonia Gandhi, whosoever is greater)

6. Two chapters in Class IV Hindi Text Book

5. Two hundred Indian delegates at the games

4. Two thousand and eight patriotic Bollywood films

3. Two billion TV debates on "Why only one medal for one billion Indians?"

2. Two Tera bytes of illegally downloaded mp3 songs

1. Two of us -- you the reader, and me the writer!


Meanwhile, if the Indian Olympic Committee is interested in bagging more Olympic Golds but without spending anything on infrastructure and training, then it should suggest to the International Olympic Committee to include "Spitting" as a sport, with following events in this new category (on the similar lines as Shooting):
  • 1m Spit

  • 5m Spit

  • 1m Running Target

  • 5m Running Target

  • Trap

  • Double Trap

  • Skeet

The Indian betel leaf should be used as ammunition, thus leading to a betel revolution in our agriculture sector.

On further research, I came across this article on the web: "Hitching a Ride with the Chinese Olympic Spitting Team". Looks like the Chinese have a PhD in Spitting! So, for the time being, Suresh Kalmadi and team have to discard Spitting and invent a new Sporting event. Any suggestions?

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